Welcome to Kitchen Witchery 101!

After countless, and sadly fruitless searches, about what it is to be a Kitchen (Hearth) Witch, I got off my booty and decided to make an easy to follow and understand, highly informative blog on the subject. We're just going to kick this blog off with a run down of some specific things.

Things like that utterly useless Rede or Three Fold Law. I figured it was best to address this first, since I'm sick to death of you namby pamby wussy witches clucking about bad karma and other related bullshit. *insert dramatic eye roll here*

First off: The Rede/ Three Fold Law is a relatively new occurrence. Those witches in our collective past had no such thing. Magic (notice I DID NOT put that stupid ass "k" at the end?) was neither black nor white, or even shades of gray. It was studied, utilized, and correctly applied. Much like cooking. Hint hint.

One cannot just run around cawing curses and flinging hexes without proper knowledge of how things work. Karma most certainly is not a living, thinking entity. But rather a collection of energy which can be tapped into and directed. Meaning: If you do something "bad", you're not automatically getting reamed by negativity. If you feel guilty about it, you bring about your own bad Karma by unintentionally tapping into that reservoir of energy and directing it (once again unintentionally) right back at you. Same with positive energy. You don't automatically collect good Karma by doing good things. It's that unintentional thought or feel good emotions that again tap into and direct that energy.

In a nutshell: Don't feel bad about cursing someone. If they deserved it, well, sucks to be them. But more power to you for NOT being someone's bitch. Don't worry about "karma biting you in the ass". If you're aware of the energy, and know how to work with it, you're perfectly peachy. So the next time some "white light witch" decides to act the part of the snotty, holier-than-thou asshat, you just smile sweetly and curse their ass to oblivion. Safe in the knowledge that Karma will most certainly not come back Three Fold to you. At least unless you feel guilty about it.

So now that we covered a basic, but needed to be understood aspect of Witchery, we can proceed with what it means to be a Kitchen Witch.

So without further waiting: A Kitchen Witch by definition is a Witch who uses practical magic centering on the home, family and hearth.

But it is so very much more. You can't just cook and call it Kitchen Witchery. To be a "true" Kitchen Witch, you need to think magically. Plant your own herb garden for spell crafting, plant tomatos outside of your home and a few of the resulting fruits from the plants in windows to keep negativity and bad spirits away. Keep a potted Basil plant in the Kitchen. Not only for easy herb access when cooking, but because Basil brings good luck to homes. Keep an Aloe plant in the kichen as well, for protection against evil influences, household accidents, and quick treatment for the cooking burns you'll most likely recieve while learning the Art. The list could go on and on. But it won't. Not for this installment at least! I'll be addressing the use of menstrual blood in cooking with my next update. Try not to eat anything...saucy while reading the next update.

See you soon!